"Nope - No Problems Here!"

It has been kind of an uneventful week, which I suppose is not a bad thing.  According to most calendars, we are now into the third trimester.  Hurray!  And also... YIKES!  My energy has improved somewhat over the past week or so, which is nice.  I'm still ready to crawl into bed by 9:00 p.m. most nights, but I'm at least able to get through the day without feeling like I'm on the brink of a coma.  I am definitely noticing the shortness of breath a lot though.  And I think I may have to give up shaving my legs soon (darn!) as I can no longer easily contort my torso around to hit every angle of my legs with the razor.  Oh well... ha!  The heartburn is back, especially at night.  Oh, and I'm drinking water like it's going out of style.  Seriously - cannot get enough of it.  Other than that, not a lot to report...

My main reason for writing this post has to do with something that happened the other night.  We were at an annual dinner for Paul's department and there were at least two other pregnant wives in attendance.  After dinner, as we were all getting ready to leave, someone made a joke about the size of someone else's truck, which in turn led to a string of innuendos.  Long story short, the wife of the guy in question was one of the pregnant ones (she is due with their 4th baby about a month before me) and someone asked her opinion about the "size" issue.  Her response was to laugh and say "No, it doesn't take much to get me pregnant.  No problems here for sure!"  To which someone else responded and said "I know what you mean, [my husband] just has to look at me and I get knocked up!"  *Cue more raucous laughter from the rest of the (now slightly tipsy) group*

All of this got me thinking again about the "ugly" side of infertility.  And I don't just mean the side effects from some of the treatments.  I'm talking about the effect that infertility has on everything from your outlook on life to your reaction to these kinds of situations.  Pre-infertility, I probably would have laughed along with everyone else at the jokes and innuendos.  But now, it isn't funny anymore.  I'm not currently in a bitter or angry or sad place about our struggles with infertility.  But I've had my moments in the past.  Moments where seemingly innocent exchanges such as these left me wanting to A) cry, or B) throw things.  The thing is, for all the progress that is being made in terms of diagnosing and treating infertility, it still isn't something that "normal" people talk about or even acknowledge.  Everyone still just assumes that if you are pregnant, you probably got knocked up the old-fashioned way.

I'm really sure where I'm going with this post, other than I just wanted to get it out somewhere and say that I wish I knew how to react in these situations.  I can't laugh along anymore, it doesn't feel right.  But neither does it feel like the time or the place to go about correcting others' incorrect assumptions.  I want to do something though.  I want to help raise awareness.  I want to educate people.  I want to feel less awkward and more empowered about our situation.

Well anyway... that's enough rambling for now.